As we continue to go back in time (are these backwards timelines hurting anyone else’s brain?), we learn more about the events leading up to the murders of Jeff Trail and David Madson – still not a satisfying “why,” in my opinion. The one thing Trail, Madson and Versace had in common, though, is the fear that they would be outed as gay.
Versace seems quite fearless about wanting to be interviewed by The Advocate, much to the trepidation of Donatella, who is afraid his outing will ruin their business. How could anyone not know Versace was gay, right? It was the ‘90s and “don’t ask, don’t tell” didn’t just apply to the military. Maybe we all knew, but back then celebrities didn’t feel comfortable confirming their sexuality, and not with great risk (Ricky Martin, who plays Versace’s partner, Antonio, came out only 10 years ago).
Jeff Trail feels the real effects of “don’t ask, don’t tell” since he serves in the military. It is pure fiction if he feared he would be found out or if he contemplated suicide, but as this show sometimes does, it really isn’t about the facts as much as it is about tapping into the culture of the time when being gay in the military meant secrets, dread, and consequences. Who knows if Trail in fact felt this way? What does matter is that this was a common feeling amongst LGTBQ service people. It was the mood.
Just like Versace, Trail bravely goes forward with his interview with “48 Hours” too (it really happened). Even though his identity is hidden, it is still a major step for him to share his experiences. He’s not publicly coming out, but he is speaking up for military personnel hiding in their own proverbial shadows.
David Madson was “out” to his co-workers and his family (though that didn’t go well for him as we saw last week), but he still seems to be dealing with a great societal fear. When Cunanan proposes, he keeps protesting “it’s illegal,” not “I don’t love you.” I think that was a choice of the writers to show 1) Madson was sympathetic to Cunanan and was trying to let him down easy and 2) Madson is very concerned with what people would think. Cunanan shames him easily after Trail’s murder that he will be judged by the police if he reports it. Again, we don’t know what was actually said, but it’s not entirely wrong as Trail’s and Madson’s murders were originally thought to be a domestic dispute and it was not taken seriously that a serial killer was on the loose.
Then there’s Cunanan. Does he have an internal shame he’s not outwardly expressing? Is his self-hate the true reason for his murder spree? It’s still not clear if his anger stems from insecurities about his own sexuality, jealousy over the success of others, or his rejection by both Trail and Madson. The man is such an enigma I feel like we still may never know his heart – or lack thereof.
We’ve come a long way from the ’90s – gay military personnel now serve openly, a celebrity’s sexual orientation barely makes headlines and gay marriage is now legal. But it’s not over yet and if this show does not solve Cunanan’s case, it still gives us an insight into the LGBTQ community we may not have been aware of. And for that, it is valuable.
Next week, we continue our journey back in time to how Madson and Cunanan met and another speculative interaction between Versace and Cunanan.
Dailybreak.com
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